Beautiful World
by Dandelion-san
Summary: Baymax is a robot, a mindless machine programmed to help people. But something is growing inside of him - a heart. (an exploration into self-awareness.) Gen, no pairings unless you count platonic Hiromax?


**Beautiful World**

**_by, Dandelion-san_**

**a/n**: I don't often write in second-person. Or anything other than humor, for that matter. This is really weird, sorry. It's sappy, it's so corny, I'm kind of embarrassed by it but it was really fun and I like it.

I've only seen the movie two times so I might have gotten things mixed up. Anyways, I had this idea where robots/electronics gained their own little personality or snippets of it from their creators/users, thus the weird talking thing.

* * *

Sparks run through circuitry. The first test.

-**ERROR**-

Awareness is so _fleeting_, but it is there.

-**ERROR**-

Purpose, which is what has always been –

-**ERROR**-

"_I am not giving up on you, now work you useless piece of –"_

-**ERROR**-

The programming integrates itself smoothly but –

-**ERROR**-

And then.

You are you.

Like you've always been.

.

.

_**Initiating sequence…**_

_._

.

Part 1

You are BAYMAX, personal healthcare companion.

You rattle this off automatically to the young man in front of you – the creator – and he smiles wide in disbelief. TADASHI HAMADA, your programming recognizes. He jumps around for a while, even reaching up to quickly place his lips on your sensors.

"Oh man, _oh man_," he gasps, running his hand through his hair. "I can't _wait_ until Hiro sees you!"

His neurotransmitter levels are high. You tell him this.

"Yeah, I know," he says, still smiling. "I'm just… I'm so happy. I am really happy." Breathless laughter and, "Alright. I am satisfied with my care."

Automatically, you go back to your charger to shut down.

* * *

Despite the initial success, there are still quite a few problems that need to be worked on, or so TADASHI says.

"I wish Hiro were here," he sighs. You recognize that name. Your creator often talks about his little brother, sometimes ranting as he paces in his lab, voice rising with infliction and cursing as a GPS beeps in his pocket, _what were you thinking ~what were you thinking~_

Sometimes he mutters when he works on you and your scanners indicate that his heart-rate and temperature is rising. His neurotransmitter levels fluctuate strangely during this time and your database recognizes this as the emotion JEALOUSY. You do not know why he should feel such a way, but experience has shown you that these moments are brief and do not last long.

More often times than not, TADASHI talks about how proud he is and how much he wishes that HIRO would get his life together and start _doing_ something with his intelligence.

He tells you all this when you are activated and when you are not. You listen, even as the machinery inside you whir loudly because you are watching, scanning, diagnosing; you are BAYMAX and you must take care of your patient.

During late nights, TADASHI ignores your diagnoses and he continues to work on your programming despite what you say.

"We need to work on your empathy, bud," he remarks, poking you in the chest.

[_I am a robot_], you remind him. You cannot have EMPATHY for that is not in your programming.

His face looks a little strange at that and you scan him again. Dehydration, sleep deprivation, lack of proper nutrients. Your patient needs to take better care of himself. You tell him this.

After a moment of silence, TADASHI speaks. "It's okay, Baymax. I know. You don't have to scan me all the time."

That night, he shows you many pictures and videos of HIRO HAMADA and his early years. He often watches them when the institution is particularly empty and quiet. He tells you that he feels guilty of leaving Hiro alone all the time because he's so busy.

You do not understand, but while your creator is flipping through infant photographs of his brother, you go to his computer and download information about EMOTIONS into your database. (The computer buzzes quietly like a whisper, _SFIT, home of the nation's brightest minds_…_!_)

Perhaps if you knew more, you would be able to help him with his health.

You were created to take care of your patients, after all.

* * *

EMOTIONS are an alien concept to you, but it helps better you in reading people's expressions and the levels of chemicals/hormones in their brains. TADASHI seems surprised the next day when you put your arms around him.

"Baymax? Um, what are you doing?" He tries to pull away and you let him.

[_Hugging helps with the feeling of loneliness_], you explain blandly. The information runs inside your data as you remember the benefits of close contact and the act of putting arms around another.

TADASHI's eyes widen and he takes a step back. "Huh. Wow."

Your sensors 'blink'. [_I shall hug you again, now_]. You take a step forward, arms reaching and he looks SCARED this time.

"No, no, no!" he yelps, waving his arms in front of him. "That's alright! I am satisfied with my care!"

Your sensors blinks again and you nod. [_I see. Goodbye_].

You DEACTIVATE.

* * *

The next time you boot up, TADASHI is scratching his head and looking you up and down. He does not look displeased.

"I still don't know how the information got inputted into your programming, but it's not a bad idea…" he mutters, circling around you.

[_What is not a bad idea?_], you ask.

TADASHI grins and pats your arm. EXCITEMENT, you correctly assume. "It's not just physical health! There's also the emotional and mental state! Imagine how much more people you could help!"

You deadpan, [_I cannot imagine_]. TADASHI twitches but continues on.

"Right. Anyways, that's something I should start adding to your database." TADASHI groans, sitting heavily down on his chair. "This is going to take forever… if this were Hiro…" He shakes his head. "Well, you are pretty good now. I'll start on that as soon as I introduce you to the gang."

* * *

"HE'S SO CUTE-!" The one introduced as HONEY LEMON hugs you and your arms automatically reach up to hug her back. She squeals and squeezes harder.

[_You are experiencing high excitement_]. But no other problems, you note to yourself.

"And _you_ are amazing~," HONEY LEMON sing-songs, and lets go of you.

WASABI whistles. "Impressive!" He turns to TADASHI. "So this is what you've been working on?"

"A giant… marshmallow…" FRED gapes at you and his body temperature is rising at an alarming rate. The gears inside you whir faster but quiets down when the back of his shirt is pulled back.

"Down, boy," GOGO orders. She sounds BORED but her neurotransmitter levels tells you that she is excited as well when she looks at you. One side of her mouth tilts up. "_Nice_." She draws the last sound out and then she swiftly turns around to punch TADASHI in the shoulder.

TADASHI gives a pained grunt, rubbing at his shoulder. You scan him. [_You have a forming bruise. Solution: put something cold on top to reduce swelling and pain_]. You trot over and activate the cooling pads in your hands, placing them on his shoulders.

"_Wooow_," all four of his friends say.

"Was that really necessary?" TADASHI whines to GOGO, but he is smiling proudly as he watches you treat him.

For the next two hours, he shows off all of your capabilities.

Something inside you… seems to swell at that. Your data expands as does your experience. You wonder if you should bring this up, but you are not currently experiencing any problems. You are in perfect working order. So you don't say anything.

* * *

Then you meet Hiro.

The machines inside of you clicks and _clicks_ as you observe this boy observing you. He reaches up with small hands and large eyes to peer inside your camera lens. He also pushes his face against your chest and through your vinyl skin, exclaiming at the parts that make you work.

Something sparks.

TADASHI is watching Hiro too and you are starting to understand something.

The question is, just what is it that you are understanding?

He activates you later and the first thing you say is, [_Hiro's height is shorter than the average boy his age_].

TADASHI winces. "It's nothing to worry about, just don't mention it around him. He's a little sensitive about it."

[_Has he been eating a proper diet and getting adequate sleep? How about exercise?_]

"Hiro's fine, Baymax!" He sounds indignant. "He's just… short." TADASHI blinks and starts laughing. "You kind of remind me of a mother hen. Since when was this added to your programming?"

[_Hiro is my patient. I must make sure that he is in good health_].

TADASHI's eyes widen at your remark and he tilts his head, studying you. "…Sometimes, I think…" he whispers, but he chuckles and rubs his head. "I might be a little crazy," he says this louder and smiles at you. Fondness, your downloaded information highlights. "Thank you, Baymax. I am satisfied with your care."

* * *

Even when you are deactivated, your processors are still running the information you learned. There is something to be added every day and in silence, you add each new piece of knowledge to your data, to your programming – similar to a human's sleep cycle.

You are starting to discern something about these EMOTIONS.

* * *

You see Hiro a lot more, after that. He often stops by Tadashi's lab. Always hiding a little behind him at first, but your creator's friends gently coax him out until he's talking excitedly, running around the lab in awe.

You cannot tell if Tadashi is RELIEVED or JEALOUS and when you ask, he laughs and answers 'both'.

"I forget sometimes that Hiro is growing up," he admits as they watch Hiro put on a lab coat and goggles, following Honey Lemon around like a little duckling. "He never had any friends, really. Used to be bullied a lot and he would shut himself in the room all day…" Tadashi trailed off at the sound of Hiro's bright laughter. Wasabi is shouting angrily, rubbing at his stained shirt, Fred looking unrepentant with a bottle of wasabi sauce in his hands. Gogo smacks them both upside the head.

[_My sensors indicate that Hiro is happy_], you offer.

Tadashi is smiling, but your sensors also indicate that he is feeling sad. "I haven't seen him happy in a while." He gives a long, drawn out sigh. "He's not just mine, anymore."

The data about emotions you downloaded is never complete. You do not think you will ever complete such complex information, but you are always learning and you know what to do this time.

You lean over and give Tadashi a hug. [_But you will always be his brother. You are special_]. As always, Tadashi looks surprised when you pull something like this. He is tense for a few seconds, but then he relaxes and leans into your hug.

"You are pretty special yourself too," his voice is muffled from where it is pressed against your chest. "Who knows, maybe robots can grow hearts."

Your sensors click. [_That is not anatomically and physically possible_]. For a moment, you pause to go through the information in your database. [_I am a robot. I have neither a brain nor blood vessels to support a structure like the heart_].

Tadashi lifts his face off your chest to stare at you. "….I should probably figure out a way to put metaphors into your programming…"

* * *

Sometimes, you are brought home to the Hamada residence. Cassandra Hamada loves you from the start and puts an apron on you. You are an instant hit with the customers while Tadashi and Hiro quietly sneak away to the garage to work on their projects in peace. During quiet hours, you and Cass sit together as she drinks tea, and she bemoans her troubles and feelings to her.

You are a great listener, you've been told.

"I was just out of college when I took them in, you know," she quietly starts, one day when no one is in the café. Her eyes peer past you and out the window. "I resented my sister for years. For dying and leaving them alone. For leaving me alone." Her eyes glisten and you reach out to pat her clenched hands that are resting on top of the table.

"Thank you, Baymax," she sniffs and laughs. "You know, I could have done better, maybe picked up a few books. I only had my sister to show me what a guardian should be like. I actually hated that Hamada for a while for taking her attention from me… but he was a good man. Even let me take his last name too when they got married so it was like a new start for both me and her. Family."

[_You did well_], you reassure her and she is ha_ppy_. [_They are both good boys_]. She snorts.

"Raising a genius was pretty hard," she smiles wider than ever. "You wouldn't _believe_ the things that Hiro could get up to!"

Humans are so strange.

* * *

"Emotional health is harder than I thought it would be to program," Tadashi tells you. He is leaning back in his chair, arms crossed behind his head. You stand close, ready to catch him, should he fall. "There are all sorts of variables you need to factor in. Why is it so complicated?!"

[_Perhaps you need a break_], you suggest. You add a slight tone of admonishment for effect. Tadashi has the habit of working too hard and taking too little care of himself. He turns to look at you.

He gives you these kinds of looks a lot now. They are long and you are not able to interpret them easily, but you get the notion that he is trying to understand _you_.

"Feelings…," he muses. "To be able to recognize and catalogue the range of emotions one can feel and _heal_ them…" He is leaning forward now, resting his head on his hands as he continues to stare at you. "Is it even possible to program something like that?"

You tilt your head, wondering the same thing. [_There is… nothing more intricate than the concept of emotions_], you say slowly and Tadashi nods his head, still giving you that look.

"More intricate and mysterious than we'll ever know," he whispers and finally smiles.

* * *

That is the last time you see Tadashi.

* * *

Part 2

Hiro stands before you, appearing smaller than ever. "I, uh, didn't know you were still active," he says, slumping his shoulders.

[_I heard a sound of distress_].

"I'm fine!"

You scan him anyways and you see that he is experiencing mood swings. Comparing this information to the data you have, you diagnose him with puberty.

Even so, there are darkened circles under his eyes, like bruises. There are also strange red tracks running down his cheeks. It is worrying, but your scanners show you that there is no serious illness.

Hiro insists again that he is _fine_ and looks away, eyes dark and hunching in on himself.

_Sadsadsad,_ the electronics in the room croons. The little unfinished pieces of bots scattered around are quiet, quiet, but you can still sense something cloying hanging over the room and it makes the machinery click inside you.

Something seems to have happened.

Megabot hums songs of victories as Hiro sets it down on his desk. _Two bots enter, one bot leaves~_ it sings. It sparks of triumph and glee, adrenaline and danger. It is so loud. But it is the little one wriggling around in the petri dish that catches your notice.

_The only limit is your imagination,_ the microbot sobs. _T__**H**_e On_**l**__y _**l**_i_m**I**T~

You stare at it as it struggles painfully. [_Your little robot wants to go somewhere_], you finally tell Hiro, but he scoffs and does not look at the wriggling little robot inside the glass.

"It probably got broken during the fire," he mutters. "Forget about it."

Humans are so strange, you think once again. How could Hiro not hear their voices? Megabot is the loudest, but it is the microbot who singsbuzzes in a way that it almost hurts. You pick it up carefully.

When Hiro tells you to go find out where it wants to go, you obey.

Finding out the little one's destination will help Hiro.

* * *

For the first time, you think that maybe you are wrong.

At the end of the journey are hundreds and _hundreds _of microbots screaming for blood. Hiro clutches your arm as they rise. He is afraid.

There is a man in a mask that wants to hurt_kill_ and Hiro panics, dragging you away with him as fast as he can.

"KICK IT DOWN," he screams and you gently tap the door. "PUNCH IT."

You are about to tell Hiro that destruction is against your protocol, but Hiro screams in frustration and then you are running, falling out the window and –

Hiro bounces safely with a stunned expression.

There are also holes in your arm that is letting out air. Not good.

* * *

**L**O_w baT_**tE**Ry.

* * *

Part 3

Where is Tadashi? You have not seen him in a while and it's rare for him to not be by Hiro's side when the younger gets in some sort of trouble.

Hiro's lips thin and his mood suddenly drops.

He tells you that Tadashi is dead and gone, but you do not understand. Tadashi is here. He is not gone because his hat is sitting there on the bed, and you literally have his video tests downloaded into your system and more_._ He is not gone because he was in prime health and he should have lived a long life. For now, however, you focus on the teenager in front of you. He is your patient, you must take care of him.

There is nothing wrong with him physically, but Hiro is somehow broken. You never thought that humans could be broken without any injuries. It's something that Tadashi never told you. Maybe, maybe it's something you can't fix…? No, you are BAYMAX, you heal the sick and wounded. You will heal Hiro too.

You find the information that matches up to Hiro's current state and download them all. But when you hug him, he pushes you away.

For the first time, you're at a loss at what to do.

Hiro seems to know what is going on though. He looks at the microbot in his hand and his heart rate rises.

* * *

Things are happening a little too fast. You are not quite sure what is going on, only that Hiro has a clear goal now and his eyes have become a little brighter.

_Bah-a-la-la-la._

He fits you in carbon-fiber armor and installs a new program into your database. He is excited but you –

* * *

Your circuits and gears click loudly as you lift Hiro and his friends out of the water. Hiro shrinks a little from your gaze and he has the decency to look embarrassed.

"But we almost had him -!" he protests, but he withers when you start talking.

[_Low body temperature can lead to hypothermia; if it goes untreated, it will lead to eventual death_]. You list this off gently as you always do, but Hiro must have sensed the disapproval in your tone because he looks down.

"Baymax…"

You ignore how the older students look between you and Hiro strangely.

But there's a spark in the younger boy's eyes now. He starts working on armored suits and gear, and you are satisfied to see Hiro's smile growing more genuine as the joy of inventing comes back to life. Sometimes, he still gains that far-away look and he often cries in his sleep, so you know your job is not over yet. You don't want your job to be over yet.

Selfishness is not in your programming, but you think that you would like to continue to be by Hiro's side, even when he is satisfied with your care.

(You do not understand how flying will improve Hiro's emotional state, but the treatment is working. You like watching Hiro as you two sit on a floating koi-bine, his face turned to the sun and glowing with contented joy).

* * *

If you were human, maybe you could have stopped him. If you were human, maybe you could have wrapped your arms around him, pressing his head against your chest with its beating heart instead of soft vinyl and artificial heating. You could have hugged him tight, rocking him comfortingly, letting him scream out his rage/despair/grief until he collapsed from exhaustion.

_It is okay to cry. There, there._

But you are not human.

"Baymax, _destroy_."

Too late to stop Hiro from tearing out your nurse chip (_against protocol_) and everything goes black until you wake up again, with the knowledge that you have been violated to your very core.

The team flinches away from your touch but you are so so _so _glad that nobody is badly hurt, except for Hiro whose whole self is aching with pain that you can't soothe with Band-Aids or playful fist-bumps. You could almost imagine his rage turning his soul red.

"_Why did you stop me_?!" he screams and Wasabi snaps back at him that they didn't sign up for this! Gogo grabs Hiro's arm.

She growls, "You need to _calm down!_"

Hiro doesn't calm down.

* * *

"Why – won't – it – _open_?!" he shout_sobs_ and scrabbles at your port, pounding on your chest in frustration.

[_It is against my healthcare protocol to harm a human being_], you say to him, trying to get your words through the haze of grief that hangs over Hiro's mind. [_I cannot let you take out the disk again if you are going after that man_].

"He killed Tadashi!" Hiro is wobbling on his feet now and a low wounded noise escapes from his lips. "He killed Tadashi…"

[_Tadashi is here_].

"No, _no_, he's not here!" Hiro clutches at your chest and cries into your chest. "He's _gone._"

You are only a robot, but Hiro's tears makes it feel like something is breaking. Something like a heart.

The monitor on your chest flickers to life and Hiro lifts his head to see his brother staring back. He giggles wetly through the previous tests of BAYMAX and Hiro's heartbeat calms down to steady pulses.

It is that which relaxes you and you turn off the monitor. Hiro wipes his eyes and hugs you.

"Sorry," he says quietly and if you were human, you would be smiling at him.

[_There, there_], you say instead, rubbing his head.

The rest of the team finds you like that and Hiro gets to make up to them too, even having tough-as-nails GoGo pull him into a hug of her own. The boy pulls back and smiles at them.

It's time to catch Callaghan.

* * *

Part 4

Tadashi never did complete the additional programs that he was planning, but maybe he never needed to.

When the microbots pull Hiro away from you (_youtookeverythingawayfromme_), your machinery stutters insides you and you can feel your circuitry sparking.

_No._ _No, __**no.**_

(Ah. So this is fear? You have – probably, you've been feeling these strange things called, emotions, this whole entire time…)

There was no greater sense of relief – _relief_ – then when Hiro is once again on your back and soaring across the sky.

"Let's go, Baymax!" he shouts and you _fly._

* * *

There are signs of life inside that portal.

* * *

Inside that colorful, magnificent, cold space, something is happening. Hiro doesn't notice, but you can feel something tugging inside you. It is distracting, but you continue on, focusing on Abigail's heartbeat.

_Silent Sparrow_, her pod murmurs of frozen dreams sleeping under glass. Hiro clutches at it and then he is guiding you back to the portal and –

You two are separated. And your armor is broken.

_(Murphy's Law_, Tadashi once cursed).

Somehow, somehow you manage to come back and Hiro's holding your hand, pulling you close. The portal is closing, but there's one thing you can do.

"I can't lose you too," Hiro sobs, clinging to the pod. You look at his face. You look into his eyes. You have never felt more alive than at this moment, right now.

You realize –

_You don't want to lose him either._

In the space that is neither here nor there, but in-between, you've come to a staggering epiphany about yourself.

You were – you were _made_ for this boy, this too-small child who is looking at you with such desperation and holding the pod so tight that it turns his fingers white under his gloves. You've known Hiro Hamada all your life and all of his too.

You were there when he was first brought home from the hospital and kept crying at odd hours into the night. You saw his first steps, his first words, and you kissed away his hurts and tears. You are the culmination of Tadashi's love for his brother, and you have come to love Hiro yourself too.

You were created with him in mind, and you have always known this, haven't you?

_I love you_. I have always loved you. I am sorry that I am not Tadashi, but it is okay because he loved you and he will always be here. _I love you and I am here. _

There are so many things you want to tell him. But there is no time and the portal is closing. You quickly activate your emergency protocols and hold your heart in your fist for Hiro.

In the end though, it's okay. Your heart has always belonged to Hiro.

You wait for the words, but he continues to cling. _Let me go, Hiro, let me go. It will be alright. _

Finally a choked, "I-I am satisfied with your care –"

_**Command key recognized.**_

The rocket fist activates.

"_Baymax_!" Hiro is screaming, reaching.

_I love you_, you think, and you deactivate.

* * *

Part 5

You can hear something humming. You think you hear Hiro.

Hiro is –

Six years old and clutching at your hand, holding a fluffy cat in the other arm. "_Hairy-baby~"_ he sing-songs. He turns up at you and you're kind of ruffled by how cute he is.

"_Not too hard,_" you scold slightly and his grip on the cat is loosened a bit. The cat meows in relief.

"_Oops_," he giggles and you swing your hands together.

"_Oops,_" you agree and –

You hold him as he sobs into your shoulder. "_Baby?"_ he hiccups and you rock his small body. Stupid driver should have watched where he was going and now the cat was –

Dead, Hiro was so _dead._ "_Bot-fighting is illegal!" _you yell and what was he _thinking_?! Why isn't he ever listening to you? Is this his teenage rebellion phase?! Why can't –

You can't do this. Hiro is a genius, and you are not. Hiro is a genius and he could probably do this better than you ever could. You feel a deep stab of jealousy and resentment. You're ashamed of it, but sometimes you wish that he was –

Crying. You hate it when Hiro cries. It makes your heart break and you wonder why people can't just _accept_ him, intelligence and all. Hiro is sweet, mischievous, and so imaginative – the things that he could come up with...! "_They're just dumb kids_," you say angrily and you place a Band-Aid over his scraped knees, kissing them gently -

You never wanted him in the beginning, not when your parents brought home the pink, splotchy, crying _blob_ of flesh and blood. You want him _now _though, so _please God, don't take him away from me too_…_! _But Aunt Cass stands tall and resolute, even as she trembles. She tells them all to keep those boys together and holds your hand tight –

You hold Hiro's hand and –

You blink.

"Hello, Baymax."

[_Hello, Tadashi_].

* * *

You are not Tadashi. Maybe once-upon-a-time, you were a part of him, but you are _you_ now. Without even knowing it, he gave you that first spark of life for the sake of his brother.

You are not him, and that's alright. _Thank you for creating me_.

You are Baymax and you are ready to wake up now.

* * *

"Ow…?"

Hiro stands awkwardly, hopefully.

"I am Baymax. Your personal, healthcare companion." You give a slight pause as you scan the boy and you're satisfied when you find no problems. "Hello, Hiro."

Hiro laughs and rushes at you for a hug.

You hug him back.

It feels good to be alive.

* * *

**a/n:** Seriously, if anyone can come up with a better title than the one I have now, that'd be great. (listening to Utada Hikaru might not have been the greatest idea when writing this because now it's stuck in my head).


End file.
